Sunday, April 3, 2011
"Rebound Love", Can it survive?
Ending a relationship that has lasted a long time, or a turbulent relationship like Jennifer Lopez, can cause different reactions from each person. From his own dubious past into inferiority. Several other people decided that the quickest way to dampen the emotions is to enter into another relationship. According to Dr Michelle R Callahan, author Ms. Typed: Discover Your True Dating Personality and Rewrite Your Romantic Future, most people tend to seek refuge because they could not live alone.
"They do not want to spend time alone to think what went wrong, instead, they look for someone new to help them release the mind from the past, their former, and the mistakes have been made in past relationships. They are looking for a diversion , "said psychologist who is frequent speak at Oprah Winfrey Show.
Rebound relationships can be done as long as you know the rules of the game:
Understand its purpose.
The most important thing to note is that you realize that this relationship is not based on love, but an escape. At least, make sure you recognize your own feelings. You need to understand that this is a normal reaction when you break a heart, so do not feel guilty about it. Even so, try not to engage too deeply with the men you make an escape.
Know the limits.
The worst thing in this kind of relationship is that you find yourself need attention, need praised. Do not be too much in demanding the attention of your new lover, emotionally and physically. You do not want to regret it later, right?
Do not do it with your friends.
Indeed, no one else who is more concerned with you, rather than your own best friend. However, you certainly do not want to risk this relationship will ruin the friendship that already exists. Not only your friends will feel used, you will feel guilty. True friends will respect you even though you both are not in a love relationship.
The biggest trap in a rebound relationship is that you do not set aside enough time to evaluate what went wrong with previous relationships. Furthermore, you also do not realize that you may contribute to the failure of that relationship. Since you already are in a new relationship, you will not be doing the evaluation process. As a result, you'll probably do the same mistake.
Was going to last long, this relationship?
The answer may be surprising, but the relationship could be long-lasting flight. At least, Jennifer Lopez has been married 5 years with Marc Anthony (this is the longest relationship ever lived, you know!). The key lies in whether you both have similar values and beliefs to relationships. For example, if both parties respect the values of honesty, hard work, and the same interests, you may actually have a chance to hold together. This can be seen from the willingness to communicate, work hard to achieve a common goal, and the desire to know the couple further.
However, you need not worry if you do not have a common interest with a partner. Get to know him further, because the common view of life or the good qualities of true is often not visible on the surface.
In fact, every relationship, whether planned or just an escape, has the ability to develop into a mutually satisfying partnership. If you're currently undergoing a rebound relationship, identify how you feel. From there you can decide whether your relationship develops as you both want. Along with that, just enjoy the relationship.