Thursday, June 2, 2011
Still In Love, but It's Not Love Anymore
Many couples who have married lover and feel the relationship began flat. This is usually experienced when the relationship has been running all these years, even without much experience problems. Then you begin to shock when in a dialogue, the he said, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you anymore."
What is the meaning of this phrase? Although preceded by the words "I love you ", but why it seems we still lose? Although you are aware of you and he's no longer vibrations, and yet it seemed a pity if an end to this relationship?
Men or women may be responding to it with a different expression. For men, the meaning is simple: the relationship must end because he had not fallen in love again to you. That he was no longer staring at you in the same way as before when just beginning to close. On the other hand, women would view that statement as an ultimatum. Can generate more feeling like a pounding when they are still being "in love" it? After all, you still love him, and he was so. Is not there a way to make this relationship should not end?
Maggie Arana and Julienne Davis in his book, Honey and Stop Calling Him Have Sex, write a concept that when couples feel the closeness and accept it as something that already naturally occur, it will kill the lust and passion. Doing little habits together, calling the couple by the name of love, or know someone too well, it also can lead to desire it evaporates.
Desire can disappear when the couple already felt more as a friend, or brother and sister. Togetherness you've defined as a friendship, not passion. Over time, you both were complaining about the problems that's all. For example, you feel your husband should be able to read your mind when you wash dishes with noise. Apparently, he ignored it as he continued watching television. He does not refuse if you ask for help. It's just boring if every time you have to ask, remind. I wish, he already understands what you want without you requested.
However, no longer feel the vibration of love does not always mean you should end the relationship. That could indicate that it is time for you to make changes. Instead, make the signs of this as an opportunity to start something new and strengthen your relationship. The most satisfying relationship is when both parties want to continue to develop and grow together. Maybe you need a little work hard, but the result is priceless, you know.